Pride is Ugly. God is Faithful

As a YWAMer, we all ‘live by faith’ in the traditional understanding of those words. None of us receive pay or are on a salary and we have to learn to raise support for ourselves, and that failing, trust God to provide for the finances and needs that we have. I do believe that we are all meant to ‘live by faith’ regardless of your job or financial status. I believe that finances are meant to be held with an open hand, allowing God to give and take as he sees fit and trust him both in lack or want, that HE is the one who provides and that he has greater financial wisdom than we could ever have. Therefore he can be trusted with our money, if it is a great or small amount.

I have lived without a salary or pay for 3 years now. It has been a challenge, to say the least. Just as soon as I reach a ‘new level’ in faith for finances, I am tested again and forced to come back to God as my sole provider.

After all these lessons and all this time, I still had a humbling lesson over the weekend.

I had some very large bills recently. Things that are not in ‘normal life’ and are unforeseen costs. I had the money for the bills as I’ve been saving what I can, but once everything was paid I was left with $20 to my name. 

On Sunday I went to church and I was chatting with God as the congregation was preparing for the offering time. I felt God ask, how much of your $20 do you have faith to give me. I told him a figure of a few dollars. Then I felt him challenge me to go beyond that figure and to trust him. So I did. Even though we are talking about small amounts, when it is the last of the money anywhere in sight, it is really hard to give it up! 

On Sunday night, a close friend of mine found out about my situation and wanted to give me some money. I replied that I was ‘too proud’ to accept it. My friend asked me if I loved my pride more than them? I didn’t have an answer so I went and spent some time praying. I felt that God told me to not be proud, so I apologized to my friend and sent them the account details.

On Monday (yesterday), I received another text message from a friend saying that they’d like to sponsor me a certain amount for a specified period of time. I was overjoyed! Although the amount promised is not even close to my monthly costs, I felt that God was showing me his faithfulness and encouraging me to keep trusting in him.