I recently read a blog post called '7 Life Changing Things I Learned From 30 Days of No Yelling' by Allie Casazza.
It struck a deep, personal chord with me, because I, too, am a yeller.
Just typing the above sentence makes me feel vulnerable. I don't like to be perceived as THAT kind of Mum. I am often complimented for my maternal patience, which I do immediately correct, because patience is one of my most lacking virtues. However, I can see that my rebuttal is seen as 'modesty'.
But it is true... I yell when I am frustrated, angry, hurt, sad. It is a learnt behaviour. I was yelled at a lot when I was a child. And now, as I see myself echoing my own childhood to my children, I know that it has to stop here and now, with me.
These past 6 months, my husband and I have been getting to know the Holy Spirit more. A lot of emphasis has been on God the Father, and Jesus, the Son, but there is a third person in the Trinity, and He is just as important to personally know.
And in knowing Him more, the Spirit, I am challenged to see how His fruit, the fruit of the Spirit, are so often not my first response.
In Galatians 5:18 - 21, there is a list of the works of the flesh, i.e. our natural selves. Among them is 'fits of anger'.
It goes on to say, in verses 22 - 23:
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."
I am not going to do a '30 Day No Yelling Challenge'.
It's not the way I work and such things are rarely effective for me.
I AM asking the Spirit to work in me, everyday, from now on.
I am currently on Day 3, and I have to confess, I have yelled at least once on each of those days. My flesh is weak. But I rest and will continue to rest in the fact that it is the Spirit who changes me.
At each 'failure' I can stop and confess my sin to God and to my children. And I will keep doing this, resting in Him, reminding myself of His Presence moment-by-moment, until I look exactly like Him.
