FAQ

Having been bombarded by anxious and excited uncles and aunties asking tons of questions about our coming baby, I thought it would be fun to answer a few of them here for all to enjoy the answers!


Q. When is baby coming?
A. I don't know. I don't know how to predict such things. We have had many 'prophesies' and predictions giving this or that date... all of which have come and gone. The longer my baby is 'cooking' the better looking and more intelligent he or she will be... That's my theory anyway, and I am sticking to it!

Q. (Upon receiving a text message from me) Are you in labour now??
A. No. If I was in labour, I would not be texting you or anyone else. 

Q. (If you see Joel alone) Where is Jasmin? Is she in labour?
A. No. If you see Joel alone, you can be sure I am not in labour because he will definitely be in there too! 

Q. Can you please let me know when baby is born?
A. Unfortunately not. There is no way to individually text every single person who has asked me to and because of that, I have not promised anyone that I will. I am VERY sure you will hear about it very soon after the event because Facebook has taken over our lives... It is not that we don't want you to know. We just know that it will not be our primary focus at the time and we don't want to promise anything that we cannot fulfill. Sorry! We still love you...

Q. Is it a boy or a girl?
A. Yes. Baby is either a boy or a girl. As we ourselves do not know (and yes, we really don't know) we are unable to tell you. However, we take great pleasure in having people confidently tell us that our baby is 'definitely' one or the other, so feel free to do so for our amusement.

Q. Are we ready? Do we have everything we need?
A. Amazingly, I think so! We have been ridiculously blessed by SO MANY people! We cannot even begin to list the people who have so thoughtfully given us the most useful and practical gifts. It has been such a testimony to us of the blessings of community and the faithfulness of our Father God to provide through such wonderful friends.

Q. Will I be practicing confinement?
A. No, not in an Asian sense. In my culture, we do take time to rest after giving birth, and I will most assuredly be listening to my body, seeing what I need to do to be healed, but I will not be following any specific rules. Just eating healthy and resting as much as I can! (And falling in love with my super cute baby)

Q. Will I have help after giving birth?
A. Yes! Thankfully, my Mum has come over and will be staying here for a few weeks after baby comes. With a background in nursing, she will be most helpful and supportive. Plus she is happy just to wash, clean and cook as required, which is the best kind of help...

One of Those Days

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Today has just been one of those days.

With less than three weeks to go, my hormones are raging and, with sleep is not coming easy, I am very tired. And my baby is not even here yet!

And I am totally amazed at some of my friends who have already had kids and managed to be nice and sweet and patient with people the whole time they were pregnant. Seriously... HOW did they do it? I feel like giving people a high five in the face... 

I feel so ugly for thinking and feeling that way. 

My husband and I are studying at Bible School this year and we are currently focusing on the book of 1 Corinthians. Today, the only thing that came to mind as I was fighting with myself to not give in to my emotions was 1 Corinthians 13 - the love chapter.

There is no point to me doing this study at all, if it is for academic knowledge, or for the certificate. It must be practical and applicable to my life. The Word of God must change me, renew my mind, help me to reflect God more - or else I am wasting my time.

And so, I sat down to let this word wash over me. 

And the truth came to set me free. My emotions are real. Hormones aren't imaginary. This is a physical reality in my body right now. But I still have a choice. Will I give in and let myself rage? Or will I allow the Holy Spirit to flow in me? 

Raging doesn't even help myself. After giving in, I don't feel any better. In fact, giving in makes me feel worse - let alone others.

But love. God's love for me. And his love through me, allowing me to respond in grace to my husband. Or whoever. This is healing for others and for myself.

And this is the truth of God, working in me practically. Am I 'fixed'? No... not really. But I am softened. And empowered to press on into him. 

1 Corinthians 13
1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8 Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.

13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Sharing On A Whole New Level

Baby Justin

I am now 8 months pregnant and this baby is really taking over!

I have a very great need for personal space, which is one of the major adjustments I faced in getting married 11 months ago. It wasn’t my husband’s company that I struggled with - no! I loved (and still love) spending time with him and have never had even a moment’s thought towards being tired of him.

His things on the other hand... that was my struggle. Having to share my space. Having to make room for his stuff. I was down right cranky for a few days when he moved in. Poor fellow.

But I adjusted and moved on. It is no longer an issue.

This baby is really encroaching on my personal space now. Physically, it is heavy. But more than that, being a very active child, most of the day and a lot of the night I can feel the squirms, kicks, hiccups, etc... At first it was cute... but now... a little tiring.

Not that I don’t totally adore and love my baby. I really do! 

As I was thinking about all of this, I realised that it is the grace of God that he gives mother’s nine months of pregnancy. 

The first stage was to mentally prepare. To wrap my head around the concept that a new life, a person, with a character and being separate from either of us was joining our family permanently. 

Then, there was the practical stage. Getting everything ready. The bed. Clothing. Pram. 

But now, increasingly so, it is about physically preparing. This baby is COMING. And as baby is growing, my belly is expanding, and it is a very visual reminder of the total ‘invasion’ that will soon be here.

As I process all of this, I am reminded of God. He is absolutely huge. Really. really. BIG. And yet he makes room for us. For me. God didn’t need to create humans. He chose to. In the massive expanse of himself, he made space for people. And then, even more amazing, he gave them all different characters. And choice. And the ability to both love and hurt. 

And then those people whom he loving created room in himself for... betrayed him. Totally heartbreaking.

I can only imagine what it will feel like the first time my child lies to me. Or steals something. Or says something nasty to me. How painful that must be. 

But God, who knows everything, willingly still chose us.

This is profoundly incredible. 

Now I am learning from him. Learning to share my personal space. Learning to give my heart willingly to someone else, knowing that one day at some point, they will hurt me.

Only God can teach love like this.

Halfway

Today marks the halfway point through this pregnancy. What a ride! I think I've been unwell more than I have been well. And I joke that this kid had better be so incredible and go on to change the world, to make up for all the trouble...

I'm not being serious.

I love my kid and he/she can be a bum if they want to.

But coming to halfway has increased the freak out factor. That is, freaking out about the fact that I have to get a whole human being out of me. Not a pleasant thought to be sure.

So far, I have been on a fairly predictable cycle of freak out, talk to God about it, calm down again, walk in trust... and then freak out again...

It doesn't help that for some reason people feel the need to tell me their horror stories now especially. Always in a kind, I-am-trying-to-help-you tone of voice.

I have been hearing stories and doing research on the whole spectrum of child birthing. There is the one extreme of supernatural/natural child birth with no intervention, through to the other end with every kind of pain relief available. And also hearing the arguments for and against each side.

And the thing is, I have no idea how my body is going to respond to giving birth. My friend has an incredibly high pain threshold and she needed intervention quite early on.

Everything is quite unpredictable and yet I need to make decisions beforehand... based on things that I don't yet know the answers to.

This has led me to think through, what is my ideal child birth.

And put simply, I want a birthing experience where the Holy Spirit is present.

I don't know practical what that looks like.

But I do know that God hasn't given me a spirit of fear, but He gave me a spirit of power, love and a sound mind (2 Tim 1:7).

And that's all I know for sure right now...